A nostalgic reflection


Bask in the golden warmth of the sun,
And hear the child-like joy and fun.
But...too bad the past has gone
and now it's time for the future anon!

Take a deep breath of the rejuvenating air,
Embolden thy hearts despite nightmares.
Let not leaving thy spirits tear-
Farewell is an occasion that you can bear...

Fear not the ramifications of the past,
Heartaches and anxieties disappear fast.
What must happen will come and fade-
the repercussions of past mistakes made.

Brave the biased stares and glares,
Reciprocate it with a knowing glance.
Be the feelings coal or gold,
Time will tell the truth a thousandfold.
Please pause and think about how you feel after reading it.

I cringed when I read this. It was just so... childish.

Long ago, people kept telling me that I smiled for no reason and wrote unrealistically optimistic prose/poem. (Example above). Apparently, I frightened with my effusive friendliness. What that felt perfectly natural to me appeared unnatural to others.

It seems that the older I grow, the more I need reasons for doing something, reasons for doing anything. Studying needs reasons; so does eating. Exercising, making friends, working - they all require reasons.

Is it simply because I'm becoming more aware to the reasons behind actions, reasons that I'm previously unconscious of? Or is it because I now need reasons just to push myself forward? Either way, it feels as though I'm becoming a soldier in the burgeoning army of soulless shoppers/ fleshy automata/ mindless workaholics flooding the world.

Realisation, oft quoted, is the first key to achieving inner harmony. This, I hope, is true.
Extra info: My BMT friends did a Google on my name, found this poem and had a field day teasing me. Over time, the initial embarrassment had mellowed into a pleasant memory. Could feel an unwanted smile spreading across the face now. :]